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October 22nd, 2014 | MOTHER 3

A few months back, we released the translation tools for MOTHER 3 so that other translators could translate the game into their native language. The tools could also allow fans to create script hacks or the like… and almost immediately after the tools were uploaded, CrabbyRhys began a quest to polish and rewrite the English script!

The rewrite project isn’t finished yet, but it recently hit a major milestone. Here are some screenshots of it in action:

Mother3Thomas Mother3Kuma3

Mother3Kuma2 Mother3Hinawa

Of course, keep in mind that the pics above are just a few lines out of the whole game, and that everything is still a work-in-progress. For more info and to stay up-to-date, visit this forum thread.

I’ve regularly said that my writing skills are extremely weak and that I cringe at a lot of my phrasing in the MOTHER 3 fan translation, so I look forward to seeing how this turns out in the end!

 

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18 Comments to A MOTHER 3 Script Rewrite Project Attacks!


Nope said on Oct. 22, 2014

Um. I can already tell that I am not going to like this.

Going by the pictures here, this dialogue is already looking really awkward, and completely unnecessary.

“Just as you thought, the children have been scampering all over the mountains and fields since we got here.” The sentence structure in that just seems really off, and hurts my brain.

Also, that whole paragraph is missing many instances where a comma would make that more readable.

Was it really necessary to change “a caramel” into “caramel”? It’s like the “new” writer is under the impression that it was a mistake, or something. “a caramel” is still a grammatically acceptable way of describing it.

“This way’s a nope.” UGH. Seriously? That whole phrase is a nope.

“Howzit?” …um. eh?? I can’t tell what’s worse. That work, or it’s suddenly random lack of context.

I should not be finding such a small amount of text in only a few screenshots to be this convoluted, awkward, and embarrassingly phrased.

Mato, you may not have complete confidence in your phrasing and grammar, but it’s a masterwork compared to this, so far. These screenshots look like a barely literate 13-year old correcting a college student’s essay.

Nope said on Oct. 22, 2014

*I can’t tell what’s worse. That word, or it’s suddenly random lack of context.

sigh. Great. Yeah, I make a post criticizing someone’s grammar and I end up typing “word” as “work”. Dammit. I just know someone is going to give me hell for that.

wvlfpvp said on Oct. 22, 2014

No, what people are going to give you hell for is wanting to put commas where they don’t belong (those sentences sure as hell don’t need them, whatever you think, and I’m sure you’re one of the many idiots who think ALL adjective phrases need a bunch of commas (it is a white strapless dress, not a white, strapless dress WOULD YOU EVER PUT AND BETWEEN THOSE TWO WORDS? NOPE DON’T PUNCTUATE IT LIKE YOU WOULD)) and give you hell for not noticing your more glaring error in that sentence.

The word is its. It’s a possessive without the apostrophe (did you see what I did there?)

Also, what’s your problem with slang? People use it, and this certainly isn’t supposed to be formal writing.

crabbyRhys said on Oct. 22, 2014

Thanks for the feedback, Nope! Would you be willing to elaborate on some of your points? How would you go about improving them? Part of the reason I’m publicizing this project and including screenshots is to get dissenting opinions so I can create a better finished product.

And no worries about the typo, happens to us all. 🙂

Asok said on Oct. 22, 2014

You also improperly used “it’s” instead of “its.” Perhaps you should have quit while you were ahead.

Ronnie said on Oct. 22, 2014

I won’t give you hell for that, but I will give you hell for using “it’s” instead of “its”.

And I agree with you. Mother 3’s original translation was already as close to perfect as it could possibly get. 😛

Hunter said on Oct. 22, 2014

crabbyRhys: for one thing, I would say “This way’s no good!” rather than “This way’s a nope!”

Anonymous said on Oct. 22, 2014

Yeah. No. Tomato’s script read fine as it was. To be brutally honest, this “rewrite” sounds, as others have mentioned, terribly awkward and amateurish at best.

Keep going if you want to, but this seems pretty pointless. You might be better off putting your spare time into something else.

Pretty much, I echo everything that Nope said.

wvlfpvp said on Oct. 22, 2014

crabbyRhys: Honestly, there is no issue, and there are NO places in the letter that need commas. The only thing even partly on-point in his rant is the dropping of “a” in front of caramel (unless you believe that all caramel is useless, in which case more power to you). Commas are exceedingly overused in places they don’t need to be nowadays, and your sentence structure is fine.

It seems his main issue is the fact that you’re not writing completely formally, which is a big “what.”

cheerleader said on Oct. 22, 2014

Seems wholly unnecessary, but it’s a free country. I wish the effort was going toward a more meaningful hack, but I’m not the boss of them now (and I’m not so big).

Neko Knight said on Oct. 22, 2014

Mato, don’t be so modest – you have excellent writing skills. I’m very pleased with how well the fan translation turned out.

Neko Knight said on Oct. 22, 2014

@wvlfpvp:
I don’t think we need grammar lessons from a man/woman/kid who can’t even spell “wolf pup” correctly. Instead of being a jerk who calls everybody you disagree with an “idiot”, you should learn how to be more empathetic and tactful in your writing.

Leeaux said on Oct. 22, 2014

Alright guys, we don’t need to trash the rewrite. He might have an interesting spin on things. Or maybe he just wanted to try and tackle the project himself. Does there need to be another translation, no maybe not. But several things have multiple translations and there’s no wrong with options.

I don’t think he was trying to imply Mato did a bad job or that it NEEDS to be rewritten.

Mato said on Oct. 22, 2014

Like I’ve said many a time, I’ve never felt confident with my actual writing skills, and I had always sort of intended for there to be a final polishing phase back when we were working on the patch. But due to time constraints that wasn’t possible.

I also lamented many times during my recent Mother 3 streams that I wish I had the time and skill to polish up my work. So this project is just sort of an eager, helpful fan saying, “Hey, I can try my hand at it!”

Plus, regardless of how the final result is, I’m glad the patch – a product of the translation team’s skills – can help other fans improve skills of their own like this.

Anonymous said on Oct. 22, 2014

^the final translation patch sounds fine, though. You always go on and on about how awkward it sounds, but it’s really not as bad as you think it is.

As far as this guy’s rewrite goes: it just seems unnecessary; especially since most people are satisfied with how it currently is anyways. Maybe if he was legitimately improving the writing in some way then it’d be fine, but his writing really does seem sub-par at best. It’d probably benefit him to put his time into something a bit more productive, rather than rewriting an entire game for a patch that, more than likely, won’t even catch on or become popular. It’d literally be “a slightly differently-worded translation of MOTHER 3” – it’d be completely pointless.

But again, this guy is free to do whatever he wants, I just feel that all this work for a “meh” rewording of your translation really isn’t worth the effort.

wvlfpvp said on Oct. 22, 2014

NekoKnight: It’s a username. Spelling is how you freaking want it to be. I replaced vowels with the consonant “v” because I didn’t feel like appending numbers to it. How about you actually READ my grammar notes (which aren’t opinions, they’re actually the rules of how English works), and I call people “idiots” because there are copy writers out there who seem to not understand that you only use commas in adjective phrases where it replaces the word “and.” Look it up. Google is your friend.

JRokujuushi said on Oct. 22, 2014

Did three people seriously criticize his use of “it’s” when it was used correctly? If we substitute the words in place of the contractions the line becomes “If it is just in your inventory it will be as useful as caramel,” which is correct.

Mato said on Oct. 22, 2014

(After removing a number of comments)
Okay, this is turning into a silly argument that’s unrelated to the topic at hand, so I’ll be closing comments for now.


 

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