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Tips for Buying EarthBound

April 10th, 2009 | EarthBound, Images

Do you have a kid? Do you like EarthBound? Then here’s the perfect thing for you!

Ozzie Boy!

Only $34 will get you this chart to measure your kid’s growth up to five feet! After that, he’s ready to go out and smash dogs and cops with baseball bats while ditching school and breaking into people’s houses!

It seems like this would be a coincidence. But every one tenth of a second something says, “No, it can’t be!” But it’s gotta be. Regular people don’t know EarthBound enough to swipe a character design from it, especially for something like this. This guy sure does have some anatomical and growth-related issues, though. Makes me think you gotta climb up on him and stab the star when it glows.

Anyway, that weirdness aside, thanks to Leonato for the tip 😀


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21 Comments to Ness is Ozzie Boy?

Poe said on Apr. 10, 2009

Holy crap! That is just too similar to be a coincidence. Nobody ever gets the bill of the baseball cap the right color, but this one did!

Jesse said on Apr. 10, 2009

Well, either this is one hell of a coincidence, the person who made this is an Earthbound fan, or maybe they saw Ness and figured nobody would know that the design is a character from a video game that nobody would remember. Either way, that has got to be more than just mere coincidence…

The Great Morgil said on Apr. 10, 2009

Dang, if i wasn’t so broke right now, i’d order one for my nephews.

HAK2 said on Apr. 10, 2009

you could actually call him ninten, because he has no backpack.

Miles Luna Vialpando (PK ELECTION) said on Apr. 10, 2009

Whoa… that is some wild coincidence.

Hejiru said on Apr. 10, 2009

*sniff* I smell lawsuit.

Neon Squid said on Apr. 10, 2009

Subliminal Earthbound campaign?

eew :E said on Apr. 10, 2009

i see video game references EVERYWHERE

Spitball Sparky said on Apr. 10, 2009

What the hell…? I’m not sure I’d feel normal using Ness’ body to measure anything.

santiagoff said on Apr. 10, 2009

Yeah , really , what the hell is that? It’s kinda ugly…

Doctor Icarus said on Apr. 10, 2009

IT’S XFIS!! It’s too tall to be normal Ness.

rayefrenzy said on Apr. 10, 2009

That thing looks like its wearing a SKIRT.

Deiphobus said on Apr. 10, 2009

i thought ness was a centimeter tall

kirbykrew said on Apr. 10, 2009

I now know what to get my newborn if it’s still available when I have a kid.

GoldenEevee said on Apr. 12, 2009

Also available in Lucas and Claus forms, each sold seperatly……

Ice Sage said on Jun. 22, 2009

Think EarthBound would have sold better if they’d used this in their marketing? 😛

But seriously, that’s disturbing. There’s no way that’s a coincidence. The hat’s coloring and position are WAY too similar.

anonymous said on Sep. 17, 2009

If that is a coincidence, that is SCARY. O.O

I wonder if it is a coincidence, or if it was intended. Hmm… It seems impossible that it was an accident, but I see the red-yellow-blue color scheme very often in children’s stuff, it wouldn’t be hard to accidentally use them in a certain pattern that looks scarily like the main character of a cult classic no one’s heard of. It’s unlikely that it was an accident though.

adam said on Sep. 20, 2009

this is sparta

Lost Hero said on Sep. 26, 2009

Ness is feeling strange…

forestjune12 said on Jan. 29, 2011

wow…. they’ll anything to screw
over earthbound fans :C

Furball200x said on Apr. 21, 2012

It even has the red shoes!


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